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April 17, 2012 / dcwisdom

If you don’t get it by 50…

I’m beginning to think that Donald Trump is right.  When he first aired his television program The Apprentice, I remember him saying at some point that he won’t work with people over a certain age, because “if you haven’t figured it out by now, you’re not going to” or something to that effect.

Last night in my professional communications class, the adjunct (who is my age, and he and I are the oldest ones in the class) looked at me with a question:  “What is that web site for people over 50 looking for a mate?”  I shrugged and said, “I don’t know.  I don’t go to those places.”  I guess he doesn’t, either, if he asked me about it, and why did he think I would know?

That question prompted a discussion on a few *ahem* professional topics, and today has me thinking some mighty severe thoughts.   Some topics bring out my analytical side, and I can analyze anything to death.   So, if you’re still here and interested, follow the trail…

In the 1970s hippie movement with the flower power, flower child, Woodstock, bare breasted, dope smoking, free love thing going on, a little, rebellious thought was introduced:  If it feels good, do it.  In the 1990s, the Nike company took it a step further:  Just do it.  The baby boomers (those who emerged from World War II into America’s Golden Age) took this and ran with it.  We preached “if it feels good…”  We sang “if it feels good…”  We worshiped the golden calf “if it feels good…”  And we made our decisions by “if it feels good…”

It seems our entire American culture is based on “if it feels good…”

So now we have baby boomers who haven’t emerged from the “if it feels good…” mentality.  We haven’t been thinking smarter.  We have dumbed-down our existence and the value of life to the lowest, shallowest, most primal rung on the ladder.  We think low instead of high.  We think with our emotions.  “If it feels good, do it.”  Except that emotions don’t answer the tough questions of life.  Donald Trump may think highly in business, but his emotional (or perhaps spiritual) needs are the same as ours in the fact that he’s working on his fourth (?) wife.

Do you pay attention to the underlying messages in commercials, your favorite television shows, music?  Purely emotional.  Think a moment about how you make decisions.  I have a few girlfriends (no, more than a few) and men acquaintances* who are in the cyclical motion of spousal shopping.  Sometimes, I get brazen enough to ask them questions like “what do you see in him?  What’s he like?  What are his habits?  What are his patterns?…”  A typical answer is “oh, he makes me laugh…we have so much fun together…”

Can you see it?  It’s all emotional.  Gratifying self.  And, if you’re 50 or older and still having trouble in relationships, something is missing, not clicking.  Because, by now, we should be thinking smarter and higher and placing value elsewhere besides in our narcissistic, self-gratifying selves.  Hey, I’m guilty.  Preaching to myself as well.  I am a product of this culture.  And very self-analytical.

Our kids and grandchildren echo and magnify our faults and themes, and we all wonder why our lives and theirs are in such disarray and unfulfilled and miserable.

(I’m turning spiritual here…leave if you must, but there’s an answer to this quandary.)   Hey, I’m not saying that I’m a sage, a know-it-all, that I have it together tied up in a pretty, little box with a nice red bow.  There are some things in my life that are train wrecks; one can’t go through this life without a few.  That’s life.

I know The One Who cleans up train wrecks and those of us over 50 who still don’t get it and Donald Trump.  (Poor Donald.  He gets picked on today.)

“…But you shouldn’t be so concerned about perishable things like food.  No, spend your energy seeking the eternal life that I, the Messiah, can give you.  For God the Father has sent me for this very purpose.”

And they replied, “What should we do to satisfy God?”

Jesus told them, “This is the will of God, that you believe in the one he has sent.”

They replied, ” You must show us more miracles if you want us to believe you are the Messiah.  Give us free bread every day, like our fathers had while they journeyed through the wilderness!  As the Scriptures say, ‘Moses gave them bread from heaven.’ ”

Jesus said, “Moses didn’t give it to them.  My Father did.  And now he offers you true Bread from heaven.  The true Bread is a Person – the one sent by God from heaven, and he gives life to the world.

“Sir,” they said, “give us that bread every day of our lives!”

Jesus replied, “I am the Bread of Life.  No one coming to me will ever be hungry again.  Those believing in me will never thirst.  But the trouble is, as I have told you before, you haven’t believed even though you have seen me.  But some will come to me – those who the Father has given me – and I will never, never reject them.  For I have come here from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to have my own way.  And this is the will of God, that I should not lose even one of all those he has given me, but that I should raise them to eternal life at the Last Day.  For it is my Father’s will that everyone who sees his Son and believes on Him should have eternal life – that I should raise him at the Last Day.”   (John 6:27-40, The Living Bible)

*men acquaintances:  I don’t make it a habit to be friends with men.  My best man friend is my husband; all others (besides my sons) are acquaintances – even nephews and in-laws.  Because I’m a married woman, men friendships are not healthy.  That’s just me.

I hope you’re not having a train wreck type of day, but if you are, call on The One Who salvages wrecks and rescues the broken:  Jesus.

Peace and love.  Pray for the peace of Jerusalem.  God bless Israel.  God help America.




  1. Mary Humphrey / Apr 22 2012 10:58 AM

    Amen! This is an amazing post. I am reading the New Testament right now, trying to stick with it and truly study, from beginning to end. Do I have it down pat? No. Perhaps I never will. But one thing is set in stone, it isn’t about us. It is about Him. I disagree with what Donald says, I do think people that are older can still get it. It is more difficult at an older age, but we can still grow.

    • dcwisdom / Apr 23 2012 3:31 PM

      And amen, again, sister. Yes, we can! 🙂

  2. debby9972 / Apr 19 2012 3:19 PM

    Amen! I need to get into the word more often.

    • dcwisdom / Apr 19 2012 10:00 PM

      I do, too. 🙂 Be blessed.

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