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May 18, 2010 / dcwisdom

Draw the Line

I really didn’t start thinking for myself until well into adulthood.  Until I was, say, 23, life was beautiful.  I was in love, oblivious, the laugh-and-be-happy type, and dumber than a rock.  

Having children settled my oblivious state and began my ‘formal’ education, because then I became responsible for someone other than myself and had to think for them.  Which means I had to think for my children.  I could no longer bee-bop along, whistling a happy song, dragging them behind me without a thought for their welfare, protection, or training.  It was my turn in history to step up to the plate of parenting. 

If I had to do it all over again, I would start with the Ten Commandments.  

Draw the Line

 

(Rabbit Trail:  Have you read The Glass Castle by Jeanette Wall?  I found that book absolutely fascinating!  Wall relates the story of her childhood that, 30 years ago, was far removed from common.  No lines.  Totally counter to my rearing.)  

Growing up, my dad was like Sam Houston at the Alamo:  Dad drew the line, and it was my choice to cross it or not.  If I stepped toward the rebellious side, he made it perfectly clear I had made the wrong choice.  Our household was not a democracy; Dad was the monarch of our little kingdom.  Dad ruled with a quiet and humorous, but firm, hand; Mom supported, and our family functioned as a well-oiled machine. 

But, that was our security.  We knew where the lines were. 

I will; I won't

 

And in rearing my own children, I drew, basically, the same lines.  Lines are individualist, but basic integrity is a good beginning.  I think that’s where many people are lacking.  And, I’ll say it here again:  If I had to do it all over, I would start with the Ten Commandments. 

Over the years, I’m still drawing many lines for myself, points in my heart that I determine not to cross.   In sharing a few of these with you and in saying the following, I have to be willing to learn new lessons and willing to forgive myself and others when things don’t always, practically never, go ideally.  

I will: 

  • worship God.
  • be faithful to my husband.
  • be the best Mom I can be to my children.  (This is a challenging one with adult children who are responsible for their own lines.)
  • be a good friend.
  • drive without texting.
  • have fun.  It can be done without crossing lines!  🙂

I won’t: 

  • rob a bank or steal from my neighbor.
  • dress like 20-year-old or a hooker. 
  • curse.
  • eat hogshead cheese. 
  • ever go parking again.  No, honey, I just won’t.

My thought is that most people don’t draw lines for themselves.  Lines are necessary.  Just ask Texans.

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4 Comments

  1. nola at alamo north / May 20 2010 2:00 AM

    I don’t know if I like the “draw the line” part because I’m a Texan, or because it’s how I was raised, too.
    On my soapbox, I just don’t think people are doing their kids any favors by not drawing lines, because when you get out on your own, LIFE DOES DRAW LINES! If you are used to it already, you don’t have such a hard time getting used to it!

  2. Vickie / May 19 2010 1:56 AM

    Second you Chicklet – what brought this on? Who stepped over your line or on your toe? Or did YOU step on somebody else’s line? ;o)

    But you’re right, we Texans all have lines that you just don’t cross. And that’s all I’m gonna say!

  3. Debbie / May 19 2010 12:40 AM

    I can’t wait to hear what generated this!
    Chicklet D.

  4. Glenda / May 18 2010 10:23 PM

    Amen, Debbie! Great post!

Comments are closed.